Scott's god

James:
Wait on... is God part of nature, or is he supernatural, not of this earth?

If the latter is true, then god isn't natural and humans should shun God!

Scott:
I do, which is why I worship a small orange called Bert.

James:
Ahhh, peace with you, my brother in Bert.

Rebecca:
Is that the one near Claire's desk that has offerings of confectionary and plastic containers to appease it nearby?

James:
I am glad to hear that you and your colleagues know the correct way to honour the sacred image of Bert.

Scott:
Bert is all-knowing and all-powerful. Fear his citrus wrath!

For verrily did not the prophet Josephin of Mandarin say "thou shalst bringeth unto him an offering of small, useful containers that you shall stack in a great heap until one day when you open the cupboard door and they all fall out on the kitchen floor."

James:
"That day shall be the Sabbath of Bert," didst Josephin decree. "The true believer of bert shalt not engage in forbidden activities on the Sabbath of Bert. For full details of forbidden activities, please consult the Cult of Bert intranet, updated daily."

Scott:
"For shouldst thou undertake a forbidden activity in the presence of the Lord Bert, great shall be his wrath and he shall smite thou from on high, declaring "Pwned!!! Noob! lol!""